The Secret to Empowerment & Living Your Best Life – Have you ever encountered someone that seemed to have it all together? A while back, I met someone like that. She was beautiful, poised, genuine, and happy. When she walked into the room her confidence glowed and her energy drew me in like a beacon. She knew who she was, and what she wanted and wasn’t afraid to ask for it. It was clear she belonged there. I wondered, what would it be like to be that way; to feel that way?
As humans, we are naturally drawn to the idea of belonging. Whether it be to a community, a religion, a team, or a relationship, belonging can contribute to a sense of security, acceptance, and purpose. In fact, the global isolation crisis in 2020 proved that when we are kept from personal connections, depression, and emotional well-being will increase the longer we remained isolated. Feeling a sense of belonging and connection is key in order to thrive and lead a fulfilling life.
We are so drawn into the concept of belonging that we look for ways to symbolically show our loyalty and commitment.
For example, sports teams wear identical jerseys, groups get the same tattoos, and partners wear a ring on a specific finger. When I was eleven, my bestie and I wore matching charm necklaces that dangled half of a golden heart. My best friend’s charm had the word “best” etched into it and mine said “friends”. Unfortunately, our desire to belong can also be detrimental when our drive to fit in turns into a wild-goose chase that has us thinking that when we’ve arrived. When we think we finally belong, we’ll be awarded the figurative golden trophy that signifies, “I am finally worthy” or “I am finally enough”.
My mom used to tell me stories about my 4-year-old self. I’d sing and dance around the house and I didn’t care what I was singing about or what I looked like. I sang confidently about the couch’s color and the shag of the carpet. Yes, I was a 70’s baby!
However, not long after that, I embarked into the world, determined to discover where I belonged.
As I started internalizing all the messages the world had to offer, it didn’t take long for my little brain to start questioning if I was enough. Did I look the part? Did I act the part? I developed a judgey critic in my head that would constantly say things like, “What’s wrong with you, Amber!?” And “Pull it together! You’re embarrassing!”
Fast forward three decades. I had gone from a girl who didn’t care if I sang off a note to a woman who’d note if anything was off. When I was told I did something wrong. Instead of seeing it as I’m a human who made a poor choice. I internalized it as “I am someone wrong” or “I am not enough.”
I’d only accept myself if others did it first; and even then, I’d question it.
- I had convinced myself that if I could be perfect then I was good, then I was worthy of love, then…
- I was worth something.
- I became my worst enemy, desperate for someone to like me because I couldn’t like myself.
So I enrolled myself in the school of life and mastered in the art of belonging.
By the time I was a teenager, I’d become very practiced at studying others Who looks happy? Who looks liked?
- I wanted to have what they had so I could feel how they felt.
- I became a people-watcher and noticed everything about those who held the adoration of others.
- I noted the clothes they wore, the way they talked, ate, and walked, how they styled their hair, and what kind of music they liked.
They all seemed happy in their groups, so I became a chaser of happiness. But why was that golden trophy still barely out of my reach?
Changing with the trends, buying happiness from products, wishing, and waiting for validation was expensive and exhausting. I cared so much about what others thought of me that I ran right over how I thought about myself. My inner spark had become so dim, it was barely noticeable. I had forgotten who I was.
I would not consider my past self an outcast. However, my struggle to feel accepted was real.
- I wanted to be happy.
- I wanted fulfillment.
- I was tired of feeling like my happiness was the effect of what others were doing around me.
Have you ever encountered someone that seemed to have it all together? I was determined to meet that woman who drew me in like a beacon. I learned she wasn’t perfect by any means. As I got to know her, I realized that her superpower was her strong sense of self-acceptance. She wasn’t chasing what the world was selling as happiness. It was her sense of inner authenticity and understanding of how to be true to her own needs and desires that caused the attractive glow.
All this time I had it backward.
I tried to belong to the world and lost myself in the process. What I needed was to reconnect with myself and discover the fierce inner love that needed to belong to myself first. It was time for me to love and accept myself, not regardless of my flaws, but including my flaws. To love all of me fiercely and foster a deep relationship with myself because I’ve recognized my own worth and value as a human being.
I discovered that the person I needed to accept me, was me.
My new quest had begun. It was time for me to figure out: Who am I now?
- What are my deep-down desires?
- What will light my inner fire?
- What will make me wake up with a passion in my heart and drive me to become the future self I envision?
It was time for me to do the work of recapturing my spark and turning up the inner glow!
On my quest
- I learned that I didn’t need to wait for the validation to feel pretty.
- I didn’t need someone to say they appreciated me to feel wanted.
- I didn’t need someone to tell me I did a good job so I could feel good about the job I did.
- I took control of my happiness instead of waiting for others to do it for me.
Belonging to myself means I’ll live in a way that aligns with my beliefs. It offers me the space and compassion needed to seek out my purpose and drive it to its truest potential. It means I’m prepared to journey through the fire and conquer my demons to rise stronger with a renewed self-image and purpose.
This life-changing work is for anyone who feels lost, anyone who desires a facelift for their life, and anyone who longs to build or rebuild a relationship with themselves. It’s a deep-dive investigation into who you are and what you need emotionally, physically, and spiritually. So you can live the life you were meant to live.
I’ve built a hybrid signature program that teaches you how to build deep, fierce inner love one step at a time.
Together we’ll uncover your true self, and identify your beliefs and passions. Enhance your mind-body connection as a powerful tool to catapult you into an enriching future, and discover the myth around body image. Learn how to shine with self-confidence and radiate beauty regardless of your size, and I’ll reveal the secret sauce on how to increase desirability and attract more of what you want in life.
It’s time to unleash your fierce inner love and start belonging to yourself before you belong to the world. When you do, it can lead to increased happiness, better relationships, and overall well-being. Elevating my self-image was the best gift I could give myself. Isn’t it about time you unlocked your true potential so you can start living your best life?
Connect with Amber: https://taplink.cc/myinnerlove.com
