Cultivating Your Inner Light – Have you ever found yourself in complete darkness in your living room, bedroom, or hallway with no lights on and only the television, a candle, or a flashlight is your main source of light?
In these moments of darkness, you put your trust in the single object omitting light. You find comfort, peace, and safety in the light.
This analogy is similar to our mindset. In order to survive the darkness, and not allow fear to lead our path, we must find the light.
The good news is that there is a spark of light within all of us. Yes, you too! A light that paves the way to hope, optimism, and joy not just for you, but for others too.
The truth is life is hard and filled with both happy and crappy days, rainbows and rain. One day you can be having the best day ever and the next day you can be on the verge of a mental breakdown because something unexpected happens.
Sometimes bad things happen to good people and you have little to no control over what occurs.
There are times that try you to your very core and push you to your limits. Times that question your purpose in life and your faith in God. Times where the pain is insurmountable and you have nowhere left to turn.
During these times, you need to hold onto your inner light the most. Hold onto the tiny fragments of hope, love, and faith within yourself.
When you find yourself in a distressing time, you have a choice. A choice to lean into the negative or positive side of the “what if coin.”
The negative side of the what if coin will lead you to overthink a situation, have anxious or catastrophic thoughts, and keep you stuck. You will most likely make decisions from a cloudy, emotional and reactive space and not a healthy, cognitive one.
However, the positive side of the what if coin will allow you to process the situation, come up with a clear plan of action, and calm your nervous system down so that you can appropriately rationalize what is happening.
I’m not saying every day is going to be rainbows and bunnies. Again, this is life and sometimes life has a different plan in mind for you.
However, it’s what you do with the moments of joy and sadness… praise and criticism… elation and deflation… that really defines who you are.
Life is filled with “should haves.” Instead of shoulding all over yourself, why not lean into the thought… What if tomorrow is better than today?
I’ve had clients say to me, “Dana-Maxx, there is no proof that tomorrow will be any better. Most days are so bad for me.” And I say to them, “Well, you don’t have proof that tomorrow will be as bad as it was today either.”
Throughout the years I have learned that life can change at any given moment. Just like you didn’t expect to go through that break-up, have to get that unexpected surgery, or lose out on that job opportunity, life can just as easily send good things your way too. You just have to remain open to them.
How do you do that? By turning your inner light switch on.
Imagine a light switch inside of you. If you turn it off, you will be consumed with darkness. However, if you turn it on, light will you’re your inner space aka your heart and mind.
When you catch yourself thinking a negative thought, stop the thought in its tracks, and say any one of the below statements to the thought. Find a statement that resonates most with you.
I switch up all three statements depending on the thought that I am experiencing:
- This thought it hurting me.
- I am the light.
- I am choosing love today.
Focusing on the negative is a trauma response and habit that you have cultivated over the years. Learning to be conscious about leaning into the bright side of life, even when darkness prevails, is key to breaking this subconscious habit.
I’m not going to sugar coat it; it takes repetition and effort to break a habit but it is doable. As much as you want to hold onto that intrusive thought, you must let it go. It has no business being in your life. It will only snowball and create more darkness.
I know you are resilient, brave, and courageous. You CAN do this! Take baby steps and let light lead the way.
As Martin Luther King, Jr. once said, “Darkness cannot drive out darkness, only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that.” Strength to Love, 1963.
Here is to YOU, a bright source of light in this world.
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Dana-Maxx Pomerantz Mindfulness and Happiness Coach Founder of The Be Happy Project
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