Conscious Conversations: A Blueprint for Authentic Dialogue – Communication is a rapid exchange of words, messages, and information. When our communication is on autopilot (as it is until it’s not), the art of meaningful connection can be easily lost. But what if we could elevate our conversations, turning them into conscious and authentic exchanges that foster genuine connections? Welcome to my world: the realm of conscious conversations. A space where words transcend mere communication to become a powerful tool for understanding, empathy, and connection.
At the heart of conscious conversations lies the idea of mindfulness. Mindful dialogue is about being fully present in the moment, listening with intent, and responding with authenticity. It’s a practice that goes beyond the superficial exchange of information. And I’ll say that again…it’s a PRACTICE.
8 Mindful Tips for Conscious Conversation
1. The Magnet Theory: Where did my communication style come from?
Chances are the way you communicate was modeled to you by those who raised you: parents, relatives, teachers, etc. When it comes to our communication (and other ways we behave), we can think of it like a magnet. One side of the magnet is totally drawn to one another, while the other is repelled. You might have developed a communication style that’s the same as those who raised you and you might have developed a communication style that’s completely opposite. I had a wonderful guest on my podcast (Self Love & Sweat THE PODCAST) who talked about how she caught herself giving her partner the silent treatment and realized it was because she often saw her mom giving her dad the silent treatment. Think about where your communication style might have come from. Try to understand it and consciously adjust it, rather than justify it and stay the same. It’s all about self awareness and giving yourself grace.
2. Shhh…it’s time to LISTEN.
One of the foundational principles of conscious communication is active listening. Truly listening to someone can be a transformative experience. It involves not just hearing the words spoken but understanding the emotions, intentions, and nuances behind them. When we actively listen, we create a space for the other person to express themselves freely, fostering a sense of validation and understanding.
3. Be YOU
Conscious conversations also prioritize authenticity. In a world where social norms and expectations often dictate our expressions, authenticity can be a breath of fresh air. Being authentic in our communication means expressing our thoughts, feelings, and perspectives genuinely, without the filter of societal expectations. It’s about embracing vulnerability and allowing others to see us as we truly are. This isn’t easy and it’s one of the major things I work with my one-on-one clients on.
4. Turn OFF The Advice Autopilot
I’m talking to myself here, too. Not everybody wants your advice. Sometimes people just want you to be present and to listen and to hold space for their feelings. In order for me to turn off my advice autopilot, I like to ask: What do you need…S, E or A? This stands for silence, empathy or advice. Let the person sharing with you tell you what they need. If they don’t want your advice, don’t give it.
5. Choose Your Words Wisely
The power of language in conscious conversations cannot be overstated. Words have the ability to build bridges or create barriers, to heal or to harm. Choosing our words mindfully and with intention is a key aspect of conscious communication. This doesn’t mean diluting the truth but rather expressing ourselves in a way that is respectful, considerate, and conducive to understanding.
6. We Are All Human and Want To Be Heard
In recognizing our common humanity, we break down the walls of judgment and create a space for empathy to flourish. Every individual carries their own set of experiences, struggles, and triumphs. Conscious conversations invite us to step into the shoes of others, cultivating empathy and compassion in our interactions.
7. Non-Verbal Communication
Our body language, facial expressions, and gestures convey volumes of information. Being attuned to these non-verbal signals enhances our understanding of others and allows us to communicate with sensitivity and depth. The best way to build non-verbal rapport with someone you’re connecting with is to mirror and match them a bit. If they are sitting down and leaning back, do the same. I can remember a specific time when I was talking with this girl I was going to hire to do some work for me and I found myself leaning over the table towards her while she was leaning back. I adjusted my posture and she was able to open up and relax even more. She definitely felt like I was all up in her space until I made those subtle adjustments.
8. Texting & DMs
In the digital age, where a significant portion of our communication happens through screens, the concept of conscious conversations takes on new dimensions. It prompts us to be mindful of our online interactions, recognizing that the absence of physical presence does not diminish the impact of our words. Don’t be afraid to call someone or hop on Zoom to clarify and connect. I was texting with a close friend recently and she replied with, “Gosh, don’t be so snappy!” And that was not my intention AT ALL. This could definitely be her own personal triggers AND it reminded me of my responsibility to communicate consciously and pick up the phone when needed.
I want to close by reminding you that conscious communication takes practice, as well as compassion and grace for self. If you’ve been communicating a certain type of way for 30, 40, or 50 years…it’s not going to change overnight completely. Keep doing your best, apologize when needed, own your words, and keep trying!
If you’re looking to work with me one-on-one and really dive into more specific strategies for you, let’s connect. You can learn more about my one-on-one coaching at Life Like Lunden.
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