Cultivating Self-Compassion: Step 11 of the NLP-Powered Journey – Wow, my year-long journey sharing my NLP path of self-discovery and personal growth is almost over. It has been an enlightening year for me to hear the individual messages, ah-ha moments, and questions from so many of you. I am so proud of the hard work you put into yourselves. As we continue this month, we arrive at Step 11: “Cultivating Self-Compassion.” For this month’s crucial stage, first, I want you to drop the word “Disorder” and refer to it as post-traumatic Traumatic Stress.
There is a reason I want you to do this. “Disorder” labels it as separate from what commonly is experienced in daily life, and that’s not true. Post-traumatic Traumatic Stress is a shared human experience. Every human being that has ever lived has experienced it. Every human being yet to be born will experience it. Don’t believe me? Ask anyone, “What was the most traumatic moment in their life?”
Now, this is cool to me; the fact that they can answer you means they are survivors. After it happens, the “Post” part is where every human being starts to work on how that moment affects their life. What doesn’t kill you CAN make you stronger. It’s called post-traumatic Traumatic Growth, a concept that refers to the positive psychological change experienced as a result of struggling with a traumatic event.
Understanding the Struggles of PTS
I want to acknowledge the profound struggles faced by ex-military personnel and first responders dealing with PTS.
These brave individuals often endure the following:
- Recurrent flashbacks: unwanted and distressing memories of traumatic events that intrude upon their daily lives.
- Hypervigilance: a constant state of heightened alertness, making it difficult to relax and feel safe.
- Emotional Disconnection: Difficulty connecting with loved ones and experiencing emotions due to past traumas.
- Avoidance Behaviors: Steering clear of situations or places that trigger traumatic memories, leading to social isolation.
- Sleep Disturbances: Persistent nightmares and insomnia resulting from heightened arousal and anxiety. Understanding these challenges is crucial to offering empathetic and practical support.
1. Perceptual Positions: Gaining a New Perspective
Perceptual Positioning is an NLP technique that involves viewing a situation from multiple perspectives to gain a deeper understanding and foster self-compassion. This technique is particularly beneficial for those with PTS. Visualizing experiences through different lenses promotes empathy for oneself and others.
First Position: Self: Recall the specific event. Fully immerse yourself in the memory, experiencing the emotions and sensations from your perspective.
- Second Position: Other: Imagine stepping into another person’s shoes during the event. See it through their eyes, understanding their thoughts, feelings, and motivations. This perspective helps you understand the actions and reactions of others.
- Third Position: Observer: Finally, take on the role of an impartial observer. View the event from a detached, neutral standpoint, analyzing the situation without emotional involvement.
Notice how different perspectives provide new insights and understanding. Integrate Insights: Return to your perspective, integrating the insights gained from the other viewpoints. Reflect on how these new perspectives can help you reframe your understanding of the event and cultivate self-compassion. By using perceptual positions, individuals can develop a more nuanced understanding of their experiences, fostering empathy and self-compassion.
2. Reimprinting: Healing Inner Child Wounds
Reimprinting is an NLP technique that involves revisiting and healing past traumatic experiences by accessing and comforting the inner child. This psychological concept represents the childlike aspects of our personality. This method is potent for those dealing with PTS, as it helps address deep-seated emotional wounds and promotes self-compassion.
- Identify a Traumatic Memory: Begin by identifying a specific traumatic memory from your past. Allow yourself to recall the emotions and sensations associated with the entire event.
- Access the Inner Child: Visualize yourself as a child experiencing the traumatic event. Please pay attention to the emotions and thoughts of your younger self, acknowledging the pain and fear they felt.
- Provide Comfort and Support: Imagine your adult self stepping into the memory and offering comfort and support to your inner child. Speak soothing words, provide reassurance, and offer safety and protection.
- Create a Positive Memory: Replace the traumatic memory with a positive, nurturing experience. Visualize your inner child feeling loved, safe, and supported. Reinforce this new memory with positive emotions and sensations.
- Reintegrate the Inner Child: Bring the healed inner child back into your present self, integrating the feelings of love, safety, and self-compassion. Reflect on how this new perspective can help you navigate challenges more resiliently.
Through reimprinting, individuals can heal deep emotional wounds, fostering a sense of self-compassion and inner peace.
Conclusion and Invitation to Step 12
Step 11: “Cultivating Self-Compassion” has provided us with powerful NLP techniques to foster empathy and understanding for ourselves and others. Through Perceptual Positions and Reimprinting, we can gain new perspectives on our experiences and heal inner emotional wounds, empowering ourselves to navigate the complexities of PTS with greater resilience and compassion.
Henry Ford said, “Whether you say you can or you can’t, you’re right.” Every time you say, “I have PTSD, or I suffer with PTSD.” Your unconscious brain believes it is the state you are supposed to be in and will do everything possible to make that happen. It’s not the thoughts that get you; the words you say have power. When you hear yourself say, I have or I suffer with PTSD,. Immediately take a deep breath and say out loud these five positive statements.
- I survived my traumatic stress.
- I have learned from it.
- I am stronger, having gone through it.
- I am growing from my experience.
- I will help someone else.
These statements can shift your perspective and empower you in your healing journey.
I extend a heartfelt invitation to you to join me next month for Step 12: “Embracing Transformation.” In this final step, we will explore how NLP techniques can help us fully embrace the transformation journey, unlocking our true potential and living a life of fulfillment and joy. I look forward to continuing this journey with you.
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