Break Free from the Lie that Holds You Back – What is the lie you’re telling yourself that keeps you from believing how amazing you are? Imagine you just finished something you’ve worked really hard on, and someone sees it for the first time. They say, “you are amazing!”
What’s your first reaction? Do you think, “Yes, I am! Thank you!”
Is it, “Thanks, but I wish this were better,” as you point out a flaw?
Or do you run over their compliment and respond with, “Mm-hmm, except I messed up here.”
Do you unintentionally place yourself on a scale of worth?
It’s easy to get tangled in the concept that there is a scale; that some humans are better than others, but I frequently watch my thoughts get tangled in the notion that there’s a hierarchy of human worth. Sometimes it’s easy to catch and other times not as much. Perhaps we view worth through the lens of status, associating it with titles and accomplishments.
Some people unconsciously tie their worth to the way they look. Others put morality into the food they eat and then think they are bad because now it’s going to show up somewhere on their body in a disagreeable way. So, they shame themselves for being so weak and eating it.
Or maybe it’s tied to how productive we are, constantly checking off tasks on our to-do lists. I know I like to check things off! This is how it sounds in my day when I’ve inadvertently placed my worth on the scale:
When my husband asks me how my day was, the first thing that comes out of my mouth is, “I feel like I got nothing done. I was busy all day and yet I can’t even tell you what I did.” What I don’t say out loud, but sure am thinking it is, “because I have nothing to show for it.” How do I know I’ve placed myself on the scale? Because I feel crappy inside when I’m telling him. That’s the sign to me that I’m making it mean something negative about myself.
Let me debunk a myth for you.
Do you believe that your worth hinges on being busy, always achieving, or constantly progressing? Whether you spend a day lounging on the couch, indulging in your favorite treats and TV shows or spend it saving the world like a superhero, your worth remains untouched. You are magnificent, just as you are. So let go of those lies that tie your worth to your actions.
If your worth was measurable, then what number of accomplishments or compliments are you going to place in front of the equal sign that signifies, yes, now you’re finally amazing! You’ve finally hit your worth. And yet I find myself in this rut quite frequently without literally saying, “your worth as a human being, Amber, equals… and then a long list to be checked off.”
There was a time when the story in my head was, If I’ve cleaned the house and it’s in order, then I can feel good about myself. A phrase that resonates in my mind is, cleanliness is next to godliness. I mean, where did that saying even come from? Was it from a mom who was trying to convince her children to keep their rooms clean and this was her last-ditch effort to convince them that they’re being like God if they could manage it?
I don’t know. What I do know is every time my house wasn’t clean, this sneaky little thought would nag at me and shame me into thinking I’d be a better person if I could just check it off my list. I’d be more worthwhile if my surroundings were neat and tidy.
Have you convinced yourself in some way that what you do, or don’t do, is somehow tied to your worth? That it moves you up a scale of worthiness?
Here’s the truth.
The truth is, worthiness has nothing to do with these external measures. You are inherently, unconditionally worthy. It’s true. Because you were created from love, by perfect, whole, amazing, brilliant beings, you, my friend, are amazing, whole, brilliant, and 100% worthy. I like to call it divine worth. This worth is non-negotiable. Your worth is non-negotiable. And yet we too frequently tell ourselves lies and feel awful about ourselves.
It’s time to ditch the scale and embrace your divine worth. It’s crucial to reframe our beliefs about worthiness and separate our identity from our actions. If you spend a day on the couch, indulging in comfort foods and leisure activities, that doesn’t diminish your worth as a human being. Our worth is constant, irrespective of our daily activities.
So, my friend, what lies are you telling yourself that are keeping you from fully embracing your inherent worth? Is it the belief that you need to constantly prove yourself, striving for an unattainable standard? Is it the notion that your worth is tied to your productivity or how organized your surroundings are? Whatever it may be, it’s time to let go of these stories and embrace your undeniable worth. You are unique, you are brilliant, and you are whole. And that makes you absolutely amazing!
If you are wanting to brush up on your skills of noticing how amazing you truly are, click the QR code and come to my free webinar.
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