Love Like a Home: How Can You Bring More Love Into Your Life? – Everyone would benefit from more love in their life. However, it isn’t always easy. As a passion, love is often corrupted by other emotions (Cue “Tainted Love”).
I’ve wasted a lot of time trying to get people to love me a certain way. But love is a precious resource, and we should accept any that people are willing to give. We shouldn’t close our hearts to people just because they can’t love us exactly how we want. We’re all unique individuals who show love in different ways.
Often, removing expectations for how you receive love will bring more into your life. People pick up on it, consciously or subconsciously, and you’ll find yourself downstream a torrent when you open yourself up. As cruel as humans can be, we are equally loving.
Loving like a home means accepting whatever love people are willing to give. A year can pass, or five, or ten, but if your heart is open, time cannot wear down the force of people’s love. In fact, love may be the only thing impervious to the relentless assault of the years. It exists outside of time altogether.
Confronting those who didn’t love me the way I wanted only drove a wedge between us. Ultimately, I realized I couldn’t change anyone. After accepting that truth, love has come into my life in abundance. My relationships are stronger and more honest. There is no underlying tension or frustration. When we’re together, the room is elephant-free (sorry, Dumbo).
Nothing in this world is more gratifying, rewarding, and fulfilling than love. But how can we open ourselves up to letting more into our lives?
As I mentioned earlier, love without expectations or conditions.
Love is not a transaction; it isn’t something that can be bartered or negotiated. Love just is. It lives in every one of us. Different people show their love in different ways. If you try to change the way someone else loves to fit what you want, you’ll push them away. Control what you can control, which is yourself, and accept the love others are giving you, even if it isn’t exactly the way you want it.
Love people for who they are, not what they can do for you.
If I love you, it’s because I see something beautiful in you. It has everything to do with who you are at your core and nothing to do with what you have- or don’t. Again, love is not a trade. When we give love, we do so without the expectation of anything in return- that’s what makes it pure.
See others as they are, not how you think they are, nor how you want them to be.
To really love someone, you have to see them for who they really are. If you refuse to do so, you will be loving someone else- probably someone that doesn’t exist. We often act as mirrors to one another, so it makes sense to see your wants or beliefs reflected in other people, but you must see someone independently of yourself to truly love them.
Don’t prioritize someone else’s needs over your own, but ensure that everyone’s needs are being met.
Some believe that loving someone means sacrificing your own needs and desires. While flexibility and sacrifice are necessary in any relationship, we have to show up as our best selves for others. That means taking care of ourselves.
Understand that we all must walk our own path.
We’re all unique individuals with our own life circumstances and experiences that inform our perspectives. Accept that you may never be able to understand how or why someone else thinks or feels a certain way, and don’t pass judgment on others for having different opinions. Remind yourself that your convictions have been forged in the crucible of your individual journey.
Accept that life is a process of constant change.
The person you love now may be different from who you knew before or will know in the future. People have the capacity to change, and if you’re unhappy with someone now, that might not always be the case. Don’t burn bridges. You never know if, someday, you may want to cross again.
Understand that love is not about possession but mutually holding space for one another.
A human being is not an object, and cannot belong to someone else. Additionally, you can’t love something you own. You can be obsessed or infatuated, but pure love necessitates the freedom to choose. It’s about being there for others because you want to, not because you have to.
Give people grace in their worst moments.
When people lash out, they are almost always upset about something relating to them- not you. So, don’t take affronts personally. Let it be like water washing over you. You’ll get wet, but the discomfort will pass, and you’ll be dry soon enough.
These principles involve a level of sacrifice. As life-affirming as love is, it takes deliberate effort and self-awareness to overcome our more selfish tendencies. Trust me when I say that it’s worth doing.
Someday, you’ll find someone who wants to know the ways you feel you need to be loved and does everything in their power to love you that way. That’s how you’ll know you’ve found your partner, or soulmate, whatever you want to call them. But you can’t expect that kind of commitment from everyone in your life. If that’s what you demand, you will push people away.
Instead, love is like a home. People will always find their way back to you.
“Hi, I’m Andrew Mercein, and I want to personally invite you to be a part of our community. ‘The Way Home’ is a place for reflection, connection, and growth. Together, we’ll navigate life’s challenges and celebrate its beauty. Let’s walk this path together.”
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