Menopause: Embracing Change With Humor And Grace
“Who are you?!”
Looking back at me was the reflection of a woman I no longer recognized. She looked drawn, haggard, and yes, she looked a little crazy, too, if I’m being honest. So no, I did not recognize her anymore, not one bit. I couldn’t connect with her emotionally, and she certainly did not feel like me physically. NOPE, I did not know who this woman was; she was a complete stranger to me. But most of all, I didn’t like her.
This woman had betrayed me. After years of taking care of her, she had turned her back on me and completely betrayed me. I despised this woman staring back at me in the mirror.
I was also 100% certain that everyone living under my roof didn’t like her either. How could they? Even they didn’t recognize this person that I had morphed into seemingly overnight. Once the calming influence and everyone’s “go-to” when needing advice and the assurance of, “Hey, everything is okay and is going to work out. Trust me.” HA! I doubt they would trust me with a plastic spoon these days. One minute, I was, at best, a moderate imposter of the wife and mother they had known. Then, POOF, I was the crazed lunatic screaming over a bag of slimy spinach in the crisper.
Who was this person? Perhaps the more accurate question I needed to ask was…
Who had I become? And how do I find my way back to the woman I was before everything went sideways?
So yes, this was me almost two years ago. If any of this resonates with you or sounds familiar to you, then you are in the perfect place! So grab yourself a cup of herbal tea, put your feet up, and join me on a little journey that may even make you smile and laugh. How? Well, I’m going to discuss menopause from a different mindset. And it’s a mindset that I hope becomes increasingly popular and warmly embraced by women, just like you, everywhere.
While we have access to much more information, education, resources, and therapies than our mothers and grandmothers did, menopause can still leave us feeling utterly hopeless in believing that any element of harmony can ever be established in our lives. To that, I say, ‘balderdash!’ And I’d also like to add, “How about we take our power back and step into our authentic badassery and embrace the strength that menopause brings us.”
Okay, I can literally hear you rolling your eyes at this. Please stay with me; at the very least, I promise to entertain you.
There is one statement I’d like you to say out loud right now, and I encourage you to repeat it daily. Even multiple times a day; and I’m quite certain you will know when those “times” are. Say it with me: “Stop fighting!” It sounds too simple and ineffective, even hokey. Okay, but let me ask you this:
“If letting go of the wheel was a strategy that gave you, and your body, space to align in better harmony, would you not be willing to let go even once to see if it made a difference?”
I’m not suggesting that simply “letting go” and not being proactive will miraculously make menopause and all its symptoms disappear. What I am suggesting is that if you were to stop fighting so hard against what is happening with your body, embrace these changes, and work with your body, it might have a more positive impact on how you feel and, more importantly, how you see the woman who is staring back at you in the mirror and the amount of kindness and grace you give her. Let that sink in.
Menopause can certainly be a crazy carnival ride. It can also be a ride where you have the power to prepare for and navigate some of those hairpin curves and abrupt stalls. Your body is one of the most amazing machines known to mankind, and while we know so much more than we ever did, there is so much more we are still learning. I believe wholeheartedly that when we tune in and really listen to what our body is telling us, it is giving us the heads up that, “Hey, things are changing here, and if you work with me, we can both get through this while still being friends.”
Am I saying you should ignore your doctors’ suggestions about therapies and treatments that can help you and give you tremendous relief? Ummmm … NO! What I’m saying is that your body has given you so much.
Your body has allowed you to do things that are truly remarkable, like carry and birth children. Your body answered all the demands you asked of it. And now your body needs something from you. Your body needs grace and patience. It needs you to understand that the changes you are experiencing are not a punishment but rather a natural part of a new phase of your life where you get to focus on YOU.
Menopause is the time in your life when you get to really delve into and embrace being selfish. This is a time where, though you may feel crazy and not at your best on many days, you have an opportunity to immerse yourself into the practice of nurturing yourself the way you have spent years nurturing others. Menopause is not your enemy; she is grossly misunderstood. And guess what?
She is not interested in fighting with you either.
So maybe, instead of looking at her like the enemy that has completely disrupted your entire life, listen to what she needs and work with her. You may find that you are finally making yourself as important a person in your life as you have made others.
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