Unmasking the Stealth Shopper: 5 Revealing Signs You’re Secretly Shopping – Are you a stealth shopper? While you may think that your shopping habits are inconspicuous, there are telltale signs that could reveal your hidden purchasing endeavors and shopping addiction. Recently in my practice, The Addictions Coach, I have found that there is more stealth shopping and shopping addiction happening, especially after the holidays when the bills pour in form all the gifts that were bought. From hiding purchases around the house, to excessive returning of items bought, these behaviors can provide insights into your shopping motives. So, if you’ve ever wondered if you’re a stealth shopper, keep reading to learn the signs to watch out for.
Signs of a stealth shopper
1: Overbuying because it is ‘On Sale.”
One of the most telltale signs of a stealth shopper is the buyer who gets double or triple the item to ‘save money ‘when something is on sale at a particular store they like. The thought of saving money sounds great until you spend double or triple on items to feel good about the sale price.
I have a client that loves Vince Camuto shoes. When she gets the notification that there is a 25% off sale, or better yet, a 50% off sale, she stocks up. She will buy 8 pairs of shoes since they are on sale, and in her mind, she is saving money. She justifies the purchase with “I got four pairs free” instead of realizing that she paid for four pairs of shoes she didn’t actually need. Her stealth shopping addiction clouds her mind into thinking that she is getting a good deal. These boxes of shoes usually end up unopened in the back of her closet once the initial dopamine boost of buying them wears off and she is hunting down the next deal.
The dopamine cycle will trap a stealth shopper into feeling good as dopamine is the ‘happy chemical’ but like all great things, it wears off until the next big purchase of items occurs. A shopping addict will get caught in the uptake and release of dopamine that floods the brain and wants more and more, and the cycle of excessive shopping starts.
2: Abandoned shopping carts
In the pursuit of that dopamine rush without hurting the wallet, a stealth shopper will load up their shopping cart and abandon it or put items back at checkout. If you have ever seen a random cart left at Target or Walmart, chances are it was a stealth shopper.
If you have ever ‘window shopped’ on Amazon Prime only to abandon your cart when it came time to check out, you may be stealth shopping. With Amazon Prime, it makes it even easier to abandon your shopping cart and not deal with public humiliation of the checkout counter. You can even shop into ‘wish lists’ and save your purchase for later, satisfying that dopamine fix of the shopping experience without the cost to your wallet.
Instacart is another great app where a shopper will abandon their cart, after spending hours looking at deals and sales only to wait on unneeded purchases. The dopamine rush comes in the act of finding the deals and loading up the cart. With online apps, it is easier than even to keep filling your cart and starting over.
3: Buying gifts year-round for a specific holiday
Shopping is a rush for the Stealth shopper. The thought of shopping, the act of actually doing it, and opening the items when you get home can give you the biggest dopamine rush. Dopamine is the happy chemical in your brain that makes you feel oh-so-good!
When it comes to a holiday, like a birthday or Christmas, a stealth shopper will start buying 6 months or more in advance. Usually, the excuse is,’ It’s on sale, and I want to save a few dollars.’ Then once the rush of the buying round is over, the items get stored in the closet until the main event draws closer. The problem is that the stealth shopper will continue to purchase more things to add to this original gift over and over and forget what they have bought.
I am sure we have all been guilty of this once or twice. The stealth shopper will do it every time there is an event, overbuying and overspending, with forgetting what was originally purchased for the event.
4: Hiding items around the house
The biggest telltale sign if you have a shopping problem is purchasing items and hiding them around the house. Do you walk in the door and hide your bags in the children’s closet? Or leave them in the trunk so your spouse doesn’t see them and sneak them into the bedroom? If so, this is the biggest red flag that you are a stealth shopper.
I had a client who would purchase clothes and then pop the tags off and throw them into the laundry machine the minute she walked through the door from a shopping excursion. When her husband would ask if that was a new top, or outfit, she would always say it had been in her closet for a while. It made more sense to her not fight about her unnecessary purchases and just wait until he got the credit card bill.
5: Excessive returns and exchanges
The final sign of a stealth shopper is their tendency to engage in excessive returns and exchanges. If you find yourself ordering multiple versions of the same product, trying them on or wearing them before deciding which one to keep, you are a stealth shopper. If you return items frequently, citing dissatisfaction or a change of mind, even if the product is in perfect condition, just to buy something else, you fall into the category of wanting the next dopamine rush with the new purchases.
More stuff. More clothes, shoes, etc., and a limited budget, leading to a seemingly endless cycle of returns and exchanges.
Stealth shopping and shopping addiction can lead to problems like debt, relationship issues, and larger addiction problems (like alcohol or drugs) when the stress of the bills piles up. If you think you have an addiction problem, please reach out to Dr. Cali Estes, The Addictions Coach, and her team at 1.800.706.0318 or contact them at www.TheAddictionCoachOnline.com
Well, you know it ends. The question is, how did we get here? The saying goes, ‘There are only 3 ways out of addiction: death, institutions, and jail.’ Tim managed all of them in one lifetime.
This book is the raw, uncut truth behind what happened that led to his death. Multiple overdoses, car crashes, hit-and-runs, police arrests, and even SWAT were no match for his addiction. IF that doesn’t shock you, what happened AFTER he died will.
Authors Note:
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